Today is my birthday. Birthdays for me are a time of reflection. Every year I have two rituals… I take a shirtless bathroom selfie to keep myself accountable to my fitness, and I add a yearly lesson to the list I’ve been keeping since I turned 40.
The tradition continues, although I’ll spare you the shirtless selfie.
Here are the 52 lessons I have learned in 52 years.
You must believe in yourself before anyone else does
Your wounds are yours to heal, your pain is yours to allay, your suffering is yours to soothe
Find friends who share your values but not all your opinions. You learn more that way
Have an honor code. Know what you stand for, fight for, will bleed, scar and die for
Contemplate death everyday. This is the cure to procrastination.
Choose romantic partners not by type, looks or status but by how they grow themselves, you, and others
Honesty is kinder than kindness
Seek purpose over power and popularity
Seek meaning over money
We humans are simultaneously insignificant and immensely powerful
Beauty is an energetic thing, so is ugly
You learn the most about people when they are stressed or inconvenienced
Easy is earned
You are an example and an experience to all you interact with. What do you want to leave them with?
No one ever became less fearful by avoiding their fears
Have boundaries, don’t carry baggage
Expectations and assumptions for others should be avoided at all costs
The truth is almost always in the grey zone
Fulfillment is what you want, not happiness
The way to soothe emotional suffering is to take a lot of long walks and do your work.
Move in the morning, create during the day, reflect in the evening
We are here to learn, to teach, and to love
It’s not leap and the net will appear… it’s leap and weave the net as you fall
Everything does not happen for a reason. Things happen and you make a reason
It’s not rise to the occasion… it’s create the occasion
The only things you can count on in life are change and death
Good people following bad ideas do horrible things
Smart people are rendered idiots by bias and dogma
Lying is poison to the soul
You understand yourself by watching yourself in action with others
Age does not correlate with maturity
Books and barbells serve better than beers and ballgames
A pretty face is of little credit. We all grow, get ugly, and die. The question is, is the world better for you being here?
Sometimes you must live your way into the answer
The cure for pain is to heal that same pain in others
Voluntary exposure to toxic people makes you the toxic one
Emotions are meant to be felt, not lived
Regret is a choice
Scared people are the most dangerous people
You must kill your old self to become your new self
If you’re doing everything right and not getting results, you’re not doing everything right
When in doubt, ask “What would love do? What would courage do?”
Have the courage to be disliked
There are two types of freedom, the freedom of all choices and the freedom of one committed choice
Stop waiting for apologies
Compliments and criticisms are feedback. They say more about the person giving them than they say about you
The best revenge is not to be that way
We get closer to truth by dismantling our beliefs, not defending them
Never allow anyone to treat you in a way you are not, or no longer wish to be
The greatest gift we can give is the authentic telling of our story of struggle
Your job is how you make money, your work is how you make a difference.
We are all vulnerable to illness and injury. Perfect health and a six pack won’t save you. Life is 100% fatal.
So many of these resonate. In particular, 28 hit hard today in navigating a team dynamic. So much to learn and grow from in this one precious life! Thanks for sharing your genius 🤍🔓☀️
Happy Birthday!! So much truth here. Wisdom doesn’t come from age, it comes from watching yourself change and having the courage to keep going.